A Poem for National Poetry Month

I shared this poem on Facebook years ago in memory of my close friend’s father dying. I decided to share it here. Enjoy.

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“Time does not bring relief; you all have lied
Who told me time would ease me of my pain!
I miss him in the weeping of the rain;
I want him at the shrinking of the tide;
The old snows melt from every mountain-side,
And last year’s leaves are smoke in every lane;
But last year’s bitter loving must remain
Heaped on my heart, and my old thoughts abide!

There are a hundred places where I fear
To go,–so with his memory they brim!
And entering with relief some quiet place
Where never fell his foot or shone his face
I say, ‘There is no memory of him here!’
And so stand stricken, so remembering him!”
Edna St. Vincent Millay

 

Poem for The Sunday Whirl

It’s been awhile since I have written in my blog.  Mostly due to doing everything from my cellphone instead of my laptop. Here is my take for the The Sunday Whirl. Maybe this will be the week to pick back up on my writing.

 

 

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Losing you is still too fresh

to work through all my grief.

My eyes sting with tears

I cannot shed, shock I suppose.

Trying to gather my thoughts

so I can remember your smile

long after mine has faded away.

It’s almost like betrayal

to live my life in peace.

The autumn chill is setting in.

Wish I could fly South for winter

and never look back on Spring.

Train whistle blows in the distance.

I touch up my make-up for no one.

Beside a tree trunk, I pause,

waiting for my mind to remember

how to inhale and exhale.

Breathing has become tricky

these days with you gone.

 

 

@Donetta Sifford 9-2-2018

 

Charles Bukowski

One of my favorite quotes by Charles Bukowski.

The Prompts:

1. Share a 10th grade memory.
2. Look into your archives. What were you blogging about a year ago around this time? Are you still dealing with the same thing? Your thoughts?
3. Write a blog post inspired by the word: falling.
4. Book review!
5. 10 things you love about Spring.
6. Share a quote you love.
7. Spring Cleaning! Share a before and after photo of a room you recently tackled.

 

“We are here to unlearn the teachings of the church, state,  and our educational system.  We are here to drink beer.   We are here to kill war.   We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.” 

          Charles Bukowski 

This is a link up to Mama Kat’s Writing Workshop.  Hop over there, choose a prompt, blog about it, share, and read other’s post. Easy Peasy! 

TTOT – Little Things

Ten Things of Thankful

 

 

 

1.  I should start this post with the fact I am so thankful I have managed to link up to Lizzi’s Ten Things of Thankful.  I’ve been out of touch too long.  Had a couple of deaths to deal with that came within two weeks of one another.  I would start to link up, and then forget.  Forgetting to be thankful sounds bad enough, so imagine how it feels.  It’s horrible.  Moving on though………..

2.  School was over for the year Tuesday.  I am thankful cause those early mornings are a bummer.  My 6th grader will be heading to 7th in the fall.  My youngest will be heading into 3rd.  I am so proud of them and they both made excellent grades. Also, my god-son, graduated last Friday from high school.  I was very proud and feeling a bit old. After all, my 20th high school reunion is in August. ugh.

3.  Vanity at it’s best,  I’m thankful that I don’t look 37, or at least I don’t think I do.  I am also very, very thankful that other than some mental illnesses, ex: bipolar disorder, physically my doctor said I’m healthy as a horse.  Surprisingly so.  She added I should be thankful because my lifestyle (her words) was a less than healthy one.  She isn’t telling me anything. I lived it. lol.  Actually, my mother at my age had diabetes, liver problems,  and wasn’t in good shape physically.  While I’ve put on quite a few pounds from the bipolar medicine I’m on, I still walk at least 3 or 4 times a week and try to stay in shape.  Go figure, the medicine they finally find that works has the side effect of weight gain. lol

4.  Ah, I added 2 “lol” on number 3.  I’m feeling very thankful for the sunshine and summer is my favorite season.  The weather has been gorgeous with the exception of a couple nights ago.  It stormed all night and we were under a tornado watch until 3 a.m.  That in itself is crazy because I live in southwest Virginia, snuggled in the heart of the Blue Ridge Mountains along the Appalachian.  We were told in school how tornadoes didn’t touch down if you live, literally on a mountain.  I do.  My small town is called Parrott Mountain.   However, 2 years ago 2 tornadoes touched down in my county and ran over what is called Draper Mountain, ripping the trees up, destroying homes nestled in the mountain, and didn’t even slow down.  In fact, once leaving the mountain, it continued across the interstate, wrecking a gas station and several other things before finally breaking up.  Thankfully nobody was seriously injured, but you can imagine the devastation because nobody in this area prepares for tornadoes.  Or at least didn’t until this happened.

5.  I am so grateful for the few personal friends that I have in my life.  I have found the saying “when you are down and out, you find out who your friends are.”  I have known this for quite sometime.  In fact, so much has happened in my lifetime, nothing truly shocks me anymore.  “Man is the cruelest animal of all.”  (Mark Twain).  Just when I thought I couldn’t be shocked by anyone’s behavior, sadly, I learned I still can be surprised when someone I’ve been close to since the age of 11 needed my help and I didn’t mind at all.  Except when it came time to pay me back, my phone isn’t blowing up, and I’m having a difficult time getting back what is owed.  It has hurt my feelings, which I have always handled by getting angry.  In the long run and grand scheme of things, $20 will not make or break me.  Understand though, $20 is what is left after she has paid me in payments for 4 weeks.  It put me in a bind somewhat being paid back that way and now I’m being avoided.  I don’t want to lose a friend over $20, but it’s a slap in the face they are willing to lose me.  (Breathing In – Breathing Out – Deep Breaths). Moving along……………

6.  My boyfriend’s daughter is having a baby!  She is due in August and she’s his only child, well, he does help me raise my daughters and he’s their “dad” in every sense of the word.  Their father loves them, of course, but he’s 7 hours away in Jacksonville, N.C. and visitations was not his strong point when he lived 30 minutes away.  They have gotten to spend a month with him for the past two summers.  Last year, they were in his wedding and they did actually spend their first Easter away from me, ever, to go to N.C.  In actuality, he sees them more a state away then he did when he lived here. ***Back to the topic at hand***  So, my boyfriend is getting ready to have a granddaughter and I’m so excited.  Her shower is coming up.  She is healthy, glowing even, and her boyfriend is a stand up guy.

7.  I read Lizzi’s list about gardens and work.  I have been very proud to keep my Wandering Jew Plant alive and wandering.  It’s a hard plant to kill but I figured I’d be the one to kill it.  In fact, it has branched off, hanging from the table it sits on, until I need to transplant it to a bigger post.  So, I was at Wal-mart yesterday and decided to purchase a few flowers to go into the  ready made flower garden.  We moved an entire curve away from my home, into his grandmother’s home who had passed away and began renting my home where my grandparents raised me.  Along with this house came a very nice looking flower bed, but it has shrubs and such in it, and needs to be tended to.  I bought some bright, smaller flowers to go around the edge.  I plan on planting them this evening after the sun has started to go down.  I could be wrong here, so any one that has a green thumb, feel free to chime in:  Isn’t it best to plant them and water them once the sun is setting so I don’t fry them?  Thanks.  

8.  I am thankful for the walks in the evening with my god-daughter, her 2 sons, and my girls.  It’s peaceful, exercise, time with her and all the children, and most of the time we share in a lot of laughs.

9.  I am thankful that I spent time with my best friend’s mother on Mother’s Day because she passed away last week.  I am so glad my girls got to see her because they knew her as MeeMee.  Her spirits were up.  We were laughing about the past, talking about when my grandmother passed away, and her mom passed away that evening.  Meaning my grandmother that raised me and my best friend Brandy’s grandmother raised her, and them passing away on the same day was so strange and unreal.  We took it as a sign from God because He knew without one another, and understanding each other’s pain, we’d never gotten through the loss.  Vicki and I spoke of the trouble her daughter, Brandy, and I had gotten into growing up.  Vicki had a way of making everyone feel special to her.  Her laughter was contagious.  I know the angels need laughter too and she’s not in pain anymore.

10.  I am thankful for the little blessings in my life that I sometimes overlook.  Things like my daughters’ making me cards at church, my god-daughter’s visits, the sun shining, having enough money to pay the bills, and having everything we need.  So this concludes my Ten Things of Thankful and I’m so glad I began the first weekend in June linking to Lizzi’s blog.