Tag Archives: life

Rushing Life

 

 

airport

image provided by Magpie Tales

Departing in a rush

’tis the season for hurrying 

so I have no time to decipher our last minute kiss.

The budding questions of romance, the first kiss lingering, wonder filled, hopeful, and lasting.

Even now as I open gifts, enjoying family and friends,

I have forgotten the reasons for running back into your arms before we boarded different flights.

Though I’ve tried,  I don’t remember the feel of your lips,  the taste is gone, and I silently damn the nature of humans to just get through one moment and scurry to the next. 

written for Magpie Tales  299 – Donetta Sifford 

TTofT ~ Fake It Til You Make It

It seems hard at times to find the “thankful” when I feel more like saying, “No thanks!!!” to life.   As they always tell people in N.A. groups, even if you used, come to the meetings and practice sobriety, a “fake it til you make it” type of mantra.  So, I’ll apply that here today.

1.   Sunshine – This has been a rainy, cloudy, and lower temp type of week.  Today had the ‘blah’ stamp of approval.  Finally, the sun began to shine about 15 minutes ago.  I believe it’s proven in scientific facts, but I know for myself, the sunshine can change my moods, and the gloomy days take a toll on my bipolar mind.  So, I’m thankful to see the sun out.

2.   Good Books – Thankful that I have some good books that I don’t mind re-reading on a cloudy day.  Although I will be even more thankful when I get a chance to grab a new one.  I’m leaning toward “Gone Girl” as my next read. 

3.    Experiences – As I was reading Lizzi’s blog on Considerings, she reminded me that my 10th grade year of high school, our science teacher took 6 chosen students that had went above and beyond in his class, rock climbing in North Carolina on Stone Mountain.  600 ft. of climbing and it was scary, wonderful, and I am going to have to scan the photos the next chance I get.  I’m glad I have gotten many chances to expand my experiences, and looking forward to more. 

4.   Music –  It is true, that as well as the sun, music can uplift someone, remind them of past, can make them feel sad, loved, happy, lonely, and if it’s good music, you will feel as if the song was written and recorded just for you.  This reminds me of my recent trip to Pigeon Forge.  I was able to record on my phone two live bands during our stay and they were fabulous.  I wish I had thought to get their names and perhaps purchase a c.d.  Sidenote to self to look online and see if I round up anything. 

5.   Necessities –  I suppose I do tend to look at the more negative side of things and I don’t remember if I’ve always done so, or if throughout life, I began to do so without realizing it.  I think the latter applies because I don’t recall being anything but happy throughout my childhood, until my grandfather had a stroke when I was 16 and in the middle of my junior year in high school.  Then it seems when recovering from one death, another seems to come along, I began looking at life more harder and feeling more bitter.  So, I want to take a moment and be thankful that my children and myself have what we need.  What we need and what we want can get confusing and run together in my mind.  Once I begin to separate what I need and what I think I need, and then what I want, I realize we have food, shelter, clothes, water, electricity, and the bills get paid, even if a struggle at times.  Then we have things we don’t necessarily need but make the days go by faster, for them t.v., for me the internet and radio, for my youngest her bike.  The small family I do have are caring and loving and so life isn’t so gloom after all.

6.  Pilates –  I am trying to lose weight at the moment.  This hasn’t been a problem for me until recently.  Willpower to stick to an exercise program is where I struggle most.  I still enjoy my evening walks with my god-daughter, my girls, and my two great god-sons.  But when the weather isn’t permitting, and I know I need to add a little bit more, I finally found a Pilate challenge for 30 days.  I haven’t gotten bored and they seem to be doing what they are intended to do.  I’ll admit I have slacked for the past week.  Also, I found the challenge bookmarked because it was to begin 30 days before Memorial Day and I bookmark things like this and forget about them.  Then in my useless attempt to organize things, I stumble across outdated challenges, outdated submissions for literary mags that I mean to submit a poem to, and other such things.  With this though, I figured that better now than never. 

7   My children – This is actually my children and my close loved ones.  Recently, things have happened that are unfair in my opinion.  Living in a small town and with everyone being so close, it has it’s ups.  The downs can really get a person down though.  I will just say that as a mother, I have made mistakes, but overall my girls are well- balanced, know they are loved, exceed in school, and feel free to talk to me about life’s little ups and downs.  We get tested all through life – tested for a driver’s license, tested throughout school, tested for employment, tested on our beliefs, but there are no study guides and then an exam when having children.  We all know how we were raised, we even believe before having children that we will be different or the same as our parents.  This doesn’t happen.  Sure, there are millions of books and articles to read about parenting.  I can’t think of one person who remembers these books when situations in life occur.  I even took Child Care in high school.  Overall, I know there are times I deserve an F and times I deserve an A+.  Thankfully, children are forgiving and resilient creatures.

8.  Blogs – Not only have I found wonderful people throughout the Blogging World, and amazing prompts, such as this one, but I’m thankful I have a place I can turn to and reflect on things I’m thankful for, things I don’t realize until typing, and a place I can keep all my poetry and little random things that make me happy.  I like Facebook, don’t check Twitter as much as I should, and definitely need to post more in my blogs, but just the same, my blogs are my favorite by far on the internet life. 

9.  Sleep – I am grateful for sleep because of insomnia.  I’m also grateful sometimes when life seems to get me down, I can sleep and wake up refreshed and feeling like I can handle anything life throws my way. 

10.  Laughter – Laughter is healthy, healing, and the best laughter sometimes happens when I’m alone and watch a movie that makes me laugh. Or a book I’m reading has a witty sentence that makes me laugh along with the characters.  Memories of silly things that bring a smile to my face.  I think that’s the best laughter of all.  Thankfully, I made it through this week, and am finished with my post for Ten Things of Thankful.  YaY.

 

 

 

 

 

”Ten

Week # 128 Fill-In Fun

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It’s week # 128 at Follow Friday Four Fill-In Fun at Feeling Beachie.  The statements are below.  Fill in your answers and link back to Feeling Beachie, grab the code, and spread  the love.  Here are my responses.  I’m running a little late in the week, but better late than never!!  

This week’s statements:
1) _________ happen
2) I hate when you ____ and _____
3) The bravest thing I have ever done is ___________
4) I like my _____________ and ________________.

1.  Make life happen.

2.   I hate when you are in a hurry and you end up behind the slowest driver on the road. 

3.  The bravest thing I have ever done is meeting my biological father for the 1st time when I was 30.

4.   I like my Honey Combs and Very Vanilla Soy Milk.

Written for: Follow Friday Four Friday Fill-In Fun

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Parrott Mountain Road

Image

 
Population three hundred
and three, with homes 
spread out within the tall
mountain. 
Church of God stands out
proudly as the smaller
Methodist church falls
behind.
Voluntary Fire Department,
half my family gives their
time, where my first birthday
party was held, at age
eighteen, my wedding
reception. 
Many celebrations that
Department has housed,
so has the Church’s
Fellowship Hall.
Crossing the two lane
bridge, that used to be 
one lane, welcome to
my town. You’ll see the
turn to go up the mountain,
or under the train trestle
on the River Rd. 
Gorgeous river where my
summers are spent, tanning,
teaching my girls to swim in
the same spot my grandfather
taught me.
Trailer serves as the community 
Post Office, it’s American flag
flying high in the Appalachian 
wind.

Once a booming coal mine town,
my great grandfather passed
away in these mountains, an
explosion. 
He’s lay to rest in the Sifford
Cemetery, with the rest of my
family long passed.
Born in the local hospital,
brought to be raised by
my grandparents, in the first
home they bought, after moving
out of my great grandmother’s
homestead as they say.
Gossip can be tiresome in a 
town this size.
Comforting to know the same
people, the elders that have 
known me since birth.

Where I am from, where I still
own my home, just a small house 
with a couple acres land, is the
sorta place you embrace or you
run like hell to find another life.
Can name everyone by name, tell
you who has been to jail, who is 
a reborn Christian. I can tell you
whose boy that is driving too
fast on these curvy roads. 
They all can tell you my secrets
as well. There are no secrets in
a community like this. 
Good or bad, I once ran, but 
came back. 

A lot of history packed in
this place. From before I 
was born to this day.
Used to be a rough town,
even as a child I seen too 
much.
Homegrown being smoked,
moonshine being bought.
People stick together. 
Still to this day have trouble
accepting outsiders, though
times have changed.
River is an attraction now
for folks out of state to fish
and camp. Campground on 
the river bank sure has
good music and people.

A person could grow old
and bitter in a place like
this, with so little to do
and so much time to make
mistakes.
Made my share of them,
with time on my hands.
Love/hate relationship
with this mountain life.
My love for it all, love
for my grandparent’s 
memory, love for 
the familiar faces, hiding
places, has kept me 
here thirty six years.
Good ol’ country place.
Yet, I have expanded
beyond the confinements
and grown into who I am.
                                            @donetta sifford 1-27-2013